By whatozgavethetinman on Saturday, June 2nd, 2012

It’s funny how, what some people’s favourite things about you are other people’s least. I’m a silly person - my best friends have come to put up with my sometimes childish behaviour and some even find it endearing. But then there are people who want me to change, be more serious, stop it.

Well, I think it’s funny and being silly never hurt a soul. What’s the problem - why are you embarrassed? We live in a world where people driven crazy on insane drug trips eat the faces off of homeless people and porn stars murder people with ice-picks, mutilate the bodies and have their way with the remains.

I’m sorry, but if anything I am proud to let go and have a little silly fun. I hate to be graphic, but living in the world I just described, it’s a fucking chore to keep your head up at times. I’ll take my giggles when I can.

So fuck off, loosen up, and let me have my fun.

By whatozgavethetinman on Tuesday, May 29th, 2012

By whatozgavethetinman on Wednesday, May 23rd, 2012

I work on a Cree reservation teaching Cree kids whose first language is Cree, whose families are Cree, and whose community is filled with mainly Cree people. I love this. I think that living with people from a different culture is a healthy exercise in global and self-awareness. The fact that my students and the people that surround me are different from me is exciting and eye-opening. Because of this difference, my students have as much to teach me as I, them.

I realize I’m not perfect and reflecting back on my experience up North there are some things I wish I’d done differently. I wish I’d gone to more hockey games, tournaments, I wish I’d sought out more community activities and made more Cree friends. Sadly I’m really young and the job took me over; I’ve yet to figure out how to excel in my career and live my personal life to the absolute fullest at the same time. But at least I was willing, at least I wanted (and still want) to learn more.

There are many non-Natives living here, mostly to work. This is no surprise - the pay is really good and there is a high demand for people in the education and health sectors. A smaller number of us come here because we’re curious, we want to know more about Native culture and we’re looking for new experiences. What shocks me, though, is that some of these peopledon’t like the people they’re living with, whose territory they’re living on and whose children they interact with on a day-to-day basis.If you don’t like the way the Cree live, or view them negatively as anentire race(I believe there is a specific term for this sort of attitude towards people of different colours…) don’t live with them. Plain and simple.

I hate to even write this because I don’t want to offend anyone, but there is no excuse for racism. It’s disgusting and cruel. If you don’t like an entire Nation, don’t impose yourself upon them. The end.

By whatozgavethetinman on Tuesday, May 22nd, 2012

Things are coming together…

A month ago, I had no idea what I’d be doing next year, where I’d be living, nothing. It was all a big jumbled mess of hope and possibilities. I had to enroll in an online English course in hopes that I would get into UBC for my B.Ed. and contact half a dozen professors from McGill and have them write testimonials as to why my courses from various departments should count for history credits. I even contacted the head of the department of History and had her write a letter on my behalf… It wasn’t looking good; I needed 8 courses in History and had completed 2. Then magically, it worked! I got into UBC! Not only did I get in, but after some phone calls I’ve already had confirmation that I will be doing my work practicum in an Indigenous school along the British Columbia coast, which just makes the entire experience all the more incredibly exciting. I start in September.

But then I realized… I have nowhere to live. I have to get to Vancouver earlier than that to find a place. And I finish my job up North in mid-June. There is no way I will find a job that will hire me on for one month… so, I’ve decided to move back to New Brunswick. Now, everything looks amazing. The future holds so much adventure! I’m moving into my cottage back home on Grand Lake where I’ll live alone and canoe every day and study for my English course. I listed my Montreal apartment on Craigslist and have already arranged 7 visits for next weekend, when I’ll go down south, transport my winter gear and show the place. They all want to sign a lease transfer - the whole getting-rid-of-my-apartment crisis I was experiencing was ridiculous and it appears I’ll have no problem doing so, after all.

I’ll hit up Osheaga in Montreal on the first weekend in August, with one of my best friends in the entire world. Then, I’ll stay in the city for a week or two, write my English exam and fly out to Vancouver. A great friend I haven’t seen in a few years has offered to let me crash at his place until I can find an apartment, or room, of my own. You know a good friend when you can go so long without even seeing each other and still have each other’s backs. Hopefully I find a funky apartment in an artsy spot with some unique, free-spirited roommates - and seeing how well everything’s going so far, I’m not worried.

I spent this weekend at a youth conference my colleagues (an amazingly unique and open-minded group of people) and I put on for the Cree kids we work with at school. We camped out on the river and talked about leadership, communication, friendship and sharing. We feasted on traditional goose, moose and walleye, slept in sleeping bags on cabin floors and sang together around roaring campfires. We swam in the freezing river, so cold it took our breath away and made our muscles cramp. We had jam sessions and made bannock and beaded and fished. On the last night, I slept under the stars for the first time and stayed up almost all night, watching the sky turn slowly lighter and lighter until the mosquitoes were too much and I slid down into my sleeping bag and drew the drawstring over my head…

Life really is beautiful. There is good in everything, if you can find it. I am so happy and so looking forward to the next year-and-a-half of my life. This summer I plan to canoe, and read poetry, and write, and go hiking with friends, and camp under the stars all over southern New Brunswick, and dig for clams and pick fiddleheads and learn how to barbeque properly. My dog is going to live with me in the country. Then I get to pick up and jump across the country, no plan in sight, and find a  new home - I wonder what it will look like. I wonder who my new friends will be, and what they’re doing right now, before I know them. I wonder who my new students will be, from which Nation they’ll hail, whose lands I’ll have the privilege of walking into and teaching upon…